Last Week in Limbo

Gin fizz on the dock: Perfection.

     Sorry I haven't updated in awhile. I move in just a few days, so all the packing and preparations in combination with Labor Day weekend has kept me sufficiently distracted from blogging. It feels like every time I cross a task off my to do list there is something new to replace it, but I am determined to fill you in a little before I fly out on Thursday.

     I truly wish I could have written about all this during my stint at the cabin, but the absence of internet service and my own dedication to relaxation prevented any productivity. I consider it sort of the crowning moment of my month of wandering. It has been a strange month, lacking a true feeling of structure or stability, and I have often equated it to being in a kind of limbo.

     Without a current job, sleeping on couches and in guest rooms, and with the majority of my possessions in boxes, my life hasn't felt like it has a lot of direction. This isn't to say that I've been a worthless bum or anything. Sure I've been watching plenty of trashy reality TV, but I've been sending in applications regularly and practicing too! Without a routine or a room to call my own, however, I just end up feeling like a vagabond or something.

    The week between Chicago Summer Opera and my move has been especially strange for me. Part of me wants to start gearing up for the unavoidable stress that moving and finding a job will force upon me in just a few days, but as my dual Pisces nature always insists, there is simultaneously part of me that keeps screaming out, "JUST RELAX WHILE YOU CAN! Cherish this last week, because your life is going to change drastically very soon."

     As usual with a prospective move, there is an overwhelming need to reconnect with friends and family before the departure. Thus, I was so thrilled that I could make it up to the family lake cabin in Wisconsin one last time this summer. The realistic side of Meghan made sure that I was responsible and packed up a sufficient amount of belongings before I made the trek up north, and once we arrived, my escapist side was like, "GAME ON!"

      It was only hot and sunny for one day at the cabin, but even in the shade and the rain, I had a great time. So while I may not have gotten a tan, I have plenty of other accomplishments to celebrate, including the following:

     1. I started and finished an entire book. The Wilder Life by Wendy McClure. As a major Little House on the Praire geek as a kid, it was a humorous and touching read. I highly recommend it.

     2. I brushed up on my bartending skills. Wouldn't want to get rusty would I? And no one seemed to complain when I brought gin fizzes down to the dock.

     3. Introduced Card Against Humanity to my parents and my aunt. We laughed so hard it hurt.

     4. After making my friend watch episodes of Sherlock, I may or may not have inadvertently created a fellow Sherlock/Watson shipper.

     5. I drank on a pontoon as we cruised our little lake. It did not live up to the country song hype, but it was enjoyable nonetheless.

     6. I bonded with my cousin and fellow cat lady about how much we will miss our cats this year! (I'm still in denial about it.)

     7.  I got regularly dominated by my friend and my mom at the game Hearts. Whist was also a frequently discussed endeavor that never came to be.

     8. Bonfire. This is always a requirement.

     9. I resisted the urge to yell back at annoying children on the other side of the lake. Eventually I reconciled my feelings by acknowledging that I would totally have been one of those obnoxiously loud kids, so I can't judge.

     10. I got to have one last reunion with my Wisconsin relatives and...my Duluth bestie! It was a complete last minute coincidence that he could join us for the weekend, and I was so glad. We hadn't been able to hang out all summer, so it was nice to touch base and goof off one more time before I head east. Pisces bonding weekend to the max!

     As we drove through the pastoral vision that is Wisconsin farmland on our way home, I joked with my mom that I would go into shock transitioning from these wide open, green spaces to the crowded city. I found myself trying to take in every moment, as if to catalog each image in my brain so that I could draw upon the memory when I needed it in New York.

     I'm not a big outdoorsy type, but I am still a Midwestern gal at heart. I like knowing that nature is at least easily accessible, just a short walk or drive away. It may not be every day that I long for Lake Superior or the wide open Iowa sky, but I will miss these places and the emotions I associate with them. I will have to be proactive about getting my nature fix in New York. Even if I have to open my computer to sift through photos, it will help. I can't believe I'm getting homesick about it already.

     Unfortunately, the time for relaxing and storing up fond memories of my homeland is at an end. I've got two days to finish packing and shipping my stuff, so it's time for productive Meghan to take over. Keep in mind when I post my next entry on this blog it will be from my new home in New York! I'm excited and terrified at the same time. I already have two auditions lined up, and the first one is just two days after I arrive. I'm jumping head first into the deep end it would seem. It's time to sink or swim!

     This last week in limbo has been amazing, and as I bid the Midwest at least a temporary "adieu," I can't help but feel blessed by my past and eager about my future. NYC, prepare yourself!